The Crux of the Matter

Is there any hoar in the Wizarding World meaner than Nagini? Sure, you've got Professor Umbridge and Belatrix LeStrange, one's a major control freak who doesn't like children and the other is just batshit crazy, (who, I suspect likes children, but only served with a nice Chianti). But a snake that invades your dreams, turning them into nightmares? One who does the bidding of the most evilly powerful wizard of his time while carrying a piece of his twisted soul is just downright sinister. BTW, I guess I should have said SPOILER ALERT! to that last part, but I'm mean too, so deal with it.

So, for all you unlucky enough to not be in the MGYC, here's what you missed out on for the August installment:

 First up is 550 yards of Dizzy Blonde Studios (Etsy store to be reopening soon.  I recommend you bookmark it) Superwash Sock, done in various shades and hues of olive and moss.  Here's a closer look:


 
A homemade nom from the kitchens of the HHiC herself.  She's calling it "Butterbeer" even though they taste suspiciously like butter rum.

 There was a stick perfume in "Poison Apple" fragrance and a "poison pen" also courtesy of Dizzy Blonde Studios, and an equally venomous stitch marker rounds out the installment.










Sssssee you sssssoon!

Drumroll please!

And the winners of our MGYC Pimps-For-Yarn contest are:

Dyed In The Wool wins the MGYC and Dizzy Blonde Studios Swag for her shout-out and club pimpage on her blog.  Thanks Amy!

RainLover's podcast love and member referral  won her a skein of Dizzy Blonde Studios yarn.

and the grand prize winner is.....

Is the suspense killing you yet?  No?  Well, let me know when it does.

Okay, okay.  The winner of the free MGYC membership is:

Katie of Knitting On The Fly! Double pimpage on her blog, then again on her podcast sent several new members to the Mean Side.  Sweeeeet!

Now, if you all haven't subscribed to the blogs and podcasts mentioned here, what are you waiting for?  They are amazing and well worth your time!

Winners, please send me your mailing addy.  I am KnottyLa on Ravelry & Plurk.  Congrats everyone!

Mean Girl Pimping

Calling all knitbloggers, podcasters and video casters!  

Want to win free MGYC membership?  Now's your chance!  Actually, you will have 3 chances to win yarny goodness with the grand prize being the membership.  Interested?  Here's what you have to do.

I still have a few spots open in Episode III, and need your help to fill them.

1. Pimp the club on your blogs, your podcasts, and your videocast.  Here's the original post for all the details of the club.  And here's the link to the blog.  Feel free to use any artwork I have on the blog, but please, no hotlinking.
2. In that entry, please instruct your readers/listeners that when they sign up, to list the name of the blog/podcast/videocast in the "special instructions to the seller" section so you get proper credit for the referral.
3. Once your entry is done, please link it in the comments section of this blog post.

There will be 3 chances to win fabulous prizes:

1. Anyone who pimps the MGYC in this manner will be entered into a drawing to win some DBS/MGYC swag;
2. For every new member you refer, you'll be entered into a drawing for some Dizzy Blonde Studios yarn;
3. The person* who refers the most new members will win a free MGYC membership**

The cut-off date for sign-ups is July 13!  Happy pimping!

*In the event of a tie, there will be a drawing for the free membership.

**If you are the winner, and you've already paid for a membership this episode, you can either opt to have this episode's membership fees refunded, or get a free membership for the next episode.

Head's Up!

Sign Ups for MGYC Ep. III start tomorrow.

Keep your eyes on the sidebar to the right for buttons to click!

Shady Dame

She was known by many names: Morgana, Morgan le Fay (of the fairies), Morgaine, just to name a few.  In the movie, Excalibur, we see her as a woman of boundless ambition and beauty whose knowledge and skills in earthly magics almost rival those of her mentor, Merlin.  So basically, right up our Mean Girl alley!

Faery Fart Installment

Faery Fart 1

There ended up being 3 similar yet different colorways, all of them featured earthy browns with mossy greens and yellow-golds.  About half were done in the brighter, more varied colorway pictured above, with most of the other half being muted and muddied, and a select few being a darker version.  I loved all 3 and couldn't decide which was best, so I ran with them the way they dyed up.  Besides, having 3 similar-but-varying colorways made for some controversy and WTFing on the members' part, and I always like to keep 'em guessing!

Poison!  Do Not Eat!

The nom is a sassafras lolly in the shape of a crescent moon and stars.  It contains an evil potion that makes you unnaturally drawn to the MGYC, and compels you to sign up for the next round:  MGYC Ep. III:  Return of the Hoar.  Shameless self-promotion in 3-2-1...(Sign ups June 17th, 9:00am-ish, California time)

'Splainin'

As you can see, there was something physically missing from this installment:  The 'extra'.  Yep, in true mean girl fashion, I've always gotta be messing with the members' shipments.  Just when the Mean Girls were getting around to wingeing about it, they received a digital copy of Leave of The Wind from Faerie Knits from Aimee at Fairieknits.  Wanna see?

Stormy Leaves

As a Mean Girl, you all know how it pains me to give a true compliment, so you'll know just how impressed I am with this beautiful lace shawlette when I say...MAGNIFICENT!  Aimee Abernathy is a truly talented designer, as well as a knitting instructor.  If you ever get the chance, take one of her classes.  And then you can thank me for it later by sending me candy, or flowers, or shoes...

Faery Fart Leaves on the Wind

Notice the lovely model?  She's one of our very own Mean Girls, Cary.  BTW, I've already laid claim to her gorgeous hair, so the rest of you bitches just better back the hell off. If anyone's gonna snatch her bald, it'll be me!  Wha?  Ahem....anyway...

As MGYC Ep. II:  Mean Girls Strike Back, I hope it's members enjoyed the shipments as much as I enjoyed sending them.  And if not?  Too bad.  This isn't the Goodie-Two-Shoes Yarn Club now is it?

"Don't bother me with your petty squabbles, I have a throne to snatch"

MGYC Ep. III Update

I know that many of you are practicing your clicky skills in anticipation of the next round of sign-ups, and that Tareshen was being an evil hoar by not giving you all an exact date...just as she should have.  Well, we now have a date:

June 17, 2011

Know it...Live it...Breathe it, and mark your calendars cuz I don't want to hear any bitching that you didn't get in because you didn't know.

MGYC Ep. 3: Return of the Hoar

Adminion Tareshen here, with a juicy little snippet for all you hoars and wannabe hoars. Please read carefully as there have been a few changes from last year. Minor ones, but we like to keep you on your toes.

Sign-ups open on Sometime in June, 2011 at Mean Girls Yarn Club blog (which means here, just in case you're wondering). This should give you plenty of time to exercise your clicky finger.

The rules remain pretty much the same as last year so you repeat offenders errr....members should know them by heart. However, I'll repeat them here for the newbies:

The Roolz.

• The cost: $150 for the entire year, payable either in 1 lump sum, or in three $50 installments. This includes priority shipping for domestic members, ground shipping for accented domestic and international members.
• Canadian and Mexican members shall be considered “Accented Domestic Members”.
• First shipment goes out in August, 2011. Shipments will go out every other month for 1 year.
• Membership will be limited to 50 people.
• The colorways are to be club exclusives. It’s all super secret until you get your installment. It will remain super secret for no less than 2 weeks after the shipments are sent. NO SPOILERS ALLOWED!
• There will be a waiting list for those of you too slow on the uptake/with the clicky finger.
• For those members who choose the payment plan, members will make their initial payment when they sign up, and then be billed the final payments in October and again in February for the remaining balance. Please note, these payments are 4 months apart.
• If members choosing the payment plan become delinquent in payment, their membership shall be forfeit if their account becomes 30-days past due, and the remainder of their membership will be offered to the next person on the waiting list.
• If you opt for the payment plan, and find you need to cancel your membership…too bad. Just kidding. Please feel free to notify me privately. I will not bite your head off…well, maybe just a nibble.
• It is the member’s responsibility to notify me if their desired mailing address differs from the one listed in Paypal. It is also the member’s responsibility to notify me in a timely manner if their address changes. If I wanted to I could read your minds, but I prefer to use my evil powers for, well…evil.
• IF for whatever lame reason, you are displeased with your yarn, (and we don’t see why you would be. This is the MGYC, it’s implied that you get what you get and you like it) anyhow… if for some reason you and your colorway aren’t getting along, just follow these simple rules…
  

1. First and foremost…NO WANKING ALLOWED!
2. Email La or Tareshen aka The Evil Adminion, and in 50 words or less inform us of your decision.
3. We’ll put the word out to your fellow members that there’s an unloved, neglected, ABUSED skein of MGYC yarn out there in need of a good home.
4. We’ll put the abandoner/adopter in touch with each other, and you all can iron out all the payment/shipping details to your little black hearts’ content.
5. If, in the unlikely event that no one wants your castoff, you can do with it what you will, but only after 6 months.
6. If all else fails, see rule #1.

So, mark your calendars for June, bookmark this webpage, subscribe to this blog, go join the Ravelry Group and get your clicky finger into shape!

Coming Attractions

So, the next and final installment of Mean Girls' Yarn Club Episode 2:  Mean Girls Strike Back, is about ready to ship, and I know some of you are looking to the future.  The question "Will there be a Mean Girls Ep. 3?" is the one I hear most often.  Well, that's a lie.  The one I actually hear most often is "Where's my damn yarn, hoar?"  but coming in a close second is "Will there be a MGYC Ep. 3?"  And my answer to that is..."As long as I have breath in my body, I will be a mean girl."  Which doesn't really answer the question at all, now does it?  Tough noogies.

Okay, okay, I'll spill.  Yes.  Yes there WILL be a MGYC Ep.3.  Sign ups will begin AFTER my luxurious vacation to Estes Park, CO...so basically, some time after June 14.  Space will be limited, and I'll post all the details in the coming days, but for you veteran mean girls....SSDD.

Bay of Pigs

In true Mean Girl fashion, I went old-school on all y'all, and found a truly tyrannical 80s style Mean Girl for this installment. Hell, some of you weren't even born yet, and probably most of you were still in diapers when Willow made it's theatrical debut in 1988. Ah!!!!! The gold old days...of course, I wasn't much older than most of you, I've just got one hell of a memory...ahem.

Anyway...

Queen Bavmorda rules from her fortress of Nockmaar with an iron fist. She imprisons all the mothers-to-be in her deepest, darkest most squalid dungeons. She hunts children with ferocious dog-beasts. She turns entire armies into bacon-on-the-hoof, and she has no qualms in destroying any and all who get in her way...even her own flesh and blood. In a word? She's magnificent!

But enough about her, let's move on to the loot, shall we?   Oooooooh!  Aaaaaaaaah!

The Collective

Reversible Project Bag Swag

The projects bags come from the evil genius that is Olivia Knits Designs. She's just updated her store, so in true Mean Girl fashion, you all should run on over there and buy up all her inventory! Okay, I'll admit, I'm sending you over there because they're so cute and adorable and if I have to look at them any more I think I'm gonna be sick. So, you'll actually be doing me a favor, really.

Army of Pigs Nom

The nom is from my own kitchen and is poison-flavored disguised as either salt water taffy or grapefruit. Be thankful that they're not maple-syrup and bacon noms. Yes, I was sorely tempted, but figuring that some of you might be Kosher hoars, I controlled myself.  Must have been a moment of weakness.  Bah!

 Stitch Marker Insert

 

 This installment's stitch marker is a little porker flanked by 2 hematite beads.  Yup, we're all going to the pigs...even the brownies. (watch the movie if you don't get the reference).

Queen Bavmorda:  The Yarn Years

 Now the yarn is super special yarn from Anne-Marie MacKay aka ColoUrplay Fibers. What makes it so super special? It knits itself! All you have to do is show it the pattern and voila! Eet Eez Kneeted. No? Not buying it for a minute? Sheesh! Okay, the specialness is that it is a yummy merino/cashmere blend in gorgeous russets, rusts and grays.
 

Now give me the yarn back or the baybeh gets it!

Dang, if you all thought figuring out the mean girl in THIS installment was tough, I'm afraid of your reaction to the next and final installment in the Mean Girls Yarn Club, Episode 2: Mean Girls Strike Back!

Hem-Hem!

No Movie Witch-themed yarn club would be complete without one of the numerous mean girls from Harry Potter. With so many baddies to choose from, how can you pick just one? Easy...pick the meanest of the mean. Yup, you guessed it! January's mean girl is none other than...

Dolores Umbridge

::shudder::

Yikes, just typing her name gives me the willies! Scares the mean right outta me. If that doesn't qualify her as the meanest of the mean, I don't know what does. I should just end this right here and now, leaving you all to wonder what the installment was all about, while go take a moment to compose myself, by burning some ants with a magnifying glass...but I'll soldier through...for you. See what her meanitude does to this Queen of Mean? Makes me be all nice and warm-hearted andother icky, soft-underbelly stuff. I hate myself right now, and now I feel guilty for it. Bah!

So, here's the big picture of January's installment:

And now, just because I'm feeling generous...here's it broken down. First, the yarn:

then the nom (it wasn't poisoned, but I considered it...wha? There are poisonous frogs in the world, you know):

the swag:

An adorable hand-made stitch marker holder from Jelby! And she was even courteous enough to sort us. (I need to "speak" to her about being so thoughtful) Yes, this one's mine. Me + Slytherin = DUH!

and finally, the stitch marker and enclosure card:

And now I will go steal candy from babies, rub kittens the wrong way, growl at puppies and kick some hoar when she's down...just so I can feel a shred of self-respect again.

::shudder:: (mommy, she's smiling at me...make her stop!!!!)